


With or Without You

by Steamcraft



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Drabble Collection, Gen, Modern Era, One-Sided Relationship, Reincarnation, Website: Heart of Camelot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-03
Updated: 2012-12-03
Packaged: 2017-11-20 04:20:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/581242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Steamcraft/pseuds/Steamcraft
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And then everything in your life just, <i>clicks</i>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	With or Without You

**Author's Note:**

> Song Challenge #5: With or Without You by U2

| - | - | - |

_To the poet whom created the cliché of 'seeing your life before your eyes'_ , Merlin thinks as he doubles over with a shout, _fuck you_.

He collapses, deaf to the frightened scream of his name. The pain is horrible, and Merlin believes he rather be run through with a sword again. He shakily withdraws the hand he pressed over the wound at his abdomen.

Oh. He feels sick, and Merlin suddenly experiences vertigo.

Hands ease him down. "Merlin, _Merlin_ \--!" The man in question blinks up at Arthur, a furrow between his eyebrows. Arthur looks terrified, all things considering: Arthur's hate and rage about Merlin- his magic- his confession, all confronted in their first life.

"I--" Merlin blinks, feeling disoriented, and stares at his gore-covered hand that is gripped in Arthur's. _When--_ "I saw the gun," he chokes, then groaned. "I didn't think to look-- I probably would have-- still..."

A mouthful of blood is swallowed. "I would have, you ass--"

"Stop," Arthur says, "Just- _stop it_." His hands shake now that Merlin's have ceased. Merlin squints at him, seeing the warring thoughts behind his eyes, wanting to be angry, wanting to be remorseful.

Merlin makes himself dizzy from shaking his head. "Its been meaningless-- right from the start, something-- something always missing. And not my magic." He smiles at Arthur, and its likely he's crying, because _Christ_ \- he's dying, but he has Arthur _staying with him_ this time.

Arthur opens his mouth, emotions siding with devastation, but Merlin interrupts. " _No_ ," he whispers. "Its better this way. Please-- I just want this one time-- I want it to be for something good. The way I thought I would, the first time-- _protecting you_. I know I wouldn't have been able to-- with you, not this time."

Another smile. "Next time, okay?"

| - | - | - |


End file.
